I realise how I Iive my life feeds back to the world. When I unfold in one area, it pulls me up in other areas and if I’m open to receive and respond to what is in front of me, it’s like my inner voice speaking to me. I Love how my body supports me to do this, but I also love how other people support as well.
For example, I attended a meeting where a group member with hearing difficulties asked us to speak up and clearly so she could hear us. I realised she spoke up, regardless of the reaction she may get from other group members. It reflected to me how I have held back just in case someone did not like what I was going to say. I also have difficulty hearing but have never spoken up about this. After the meeting, I thanked her for speaking up and shared with her my own difficulties doing the same. She also said she noticed that I spoke quietly and sometimes stopped in the middle of a sentence. Stopping in the middle of sentences is felt as an old pattern or behaviour, as is leaning forward to hear what people are saying.
I developed this because for years I wasn’t able to hear people clearly and when you lean forward, you’re not able to speak clearly because the body is compressed.
I read somewhere we need to bring all that we are, in every moment. I realised that holding on to old patterns keeps me stuck in those patterns and prevents me from making changes to those behaviours.
The offering for me now is to continue to observe when I am holding back and to be open to communicating in groups or one-to-one. This means giving myself permission to express all that I am and using my body to support me instead of using it to compress me. Bringing all that you are in every situation also supports others. When the woman spoke up, it was an offering for me to be the same.